Leave It

I wonder how much wouldn't be committed to reality if it wasn't verbalized?

I know that verbalizing makes things more real, or possibly actually real. There is a lot we can get away with if it's never journaled or discussed with another. Generally the verbalizing route is a good way to operate, especially if there is any inkling of intentionality toward living closely and honestly with people/God. People have varying degrees of comfort and readiness for this sort of thing and that's both healthy and respectable for a myriad of reasons. But I wonder if the opposite is not true as well, that sometimes we verbalize things that don't need to actually be as real as we try to make them. Or maybe the better way of putting it is that by verbalizing something we give it more credit, more weight,or more significance than it deserves.

How much of the thought processes that we have just don't need to be given the time of day? Do we really always need to have a long, lengthy, drawn out discussion about things we wish we didn't feel or think or wish didn't bother us but do? Or could some of this just be left alone to find it's way out on it's own. Kind of like ignoring child who is pouting. Usually they get sick of pouting if it's ignored and find a better way. That may not be the perfect example, but it's close. I recognize this is a fine line both with children and feelings. I'm of course not advocating not verbalizing feelings, but can we stretch that to an unhealthy point where every feeling has to be named, verbalized, validated and dealt with through a long arduous process of self reflection? Recently as I was talking more to fill space than for the real need to process anything,I realized I was giving small things big space and heavy weight. They didn't need that. They needed to be fought against with truth, and then left to die alone. I decided some things are better off without attention. I soon found after deciding this, that it's much easier said than done. Sometimes I need the poetry and repetition and length of the raw feelings from Psalms, but other times I'm better off sticking closely to the clear, direct, raw and true words of the Proverbs to aid in diverting my attention from things that could grow but shouldn't. Here's a few of the Proverbs to which I have attempted to divert my attention:

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.13:12

Fools make fun of guilt but the godly acknowledge it and seek reconciliation.14:9

A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body;jealousy is like a cancer in the bones 14:30

Gentle words are a tree of life; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.15:4

A wise person is hungry for knowledge, while the fool feeds on trash 15:14

Fear of the Lord teaches wisdom; humility precedes honor 15:33 (and chpt 2)

We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer 16:1

Get all the advice and instruction you can, so you will be wise the rest of your life. 19:20

Many will say they are loyal friends, but who can find one who is truly reliable? 20:6

The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything else along the way? 20:24

The Lord's light penetrates the human spirit, exposing every hidden motive. 20:27

An honest answer is like a kiss of friendship 24:26